Too hard...

{"You tried too hard," he said.

"I know," she said. 

"But," he began, "it's okay, because you can begin again."}

I know my Savior Lives.

I love Him.

Yesterday I had the privilege to go to the Conference Center for the General Relief Society Broadcast.

While I was listening, a small hole in my heart seemed to fill. I found what I was missing, and I realized that I was foolish enough to believe that I had been missing something physical, something touchable.

I see now that I was wrong, because there is enough.

There is enough time, enough money, enough goodness to keep going.

There is enough love and hope and faith.

There is enough, because God never faileth.

Because God has steered this world since its existence, so why would He stop now?

With utmost sincerity,

Kaitlin R.

The race...

She was a tortoise. He was a hare.

And they ran the race together.

With utmost sincerity, 

Kaitlin R. 

 

Life gave me...

A sweet-heart I know showed me this song and I wish to share it with you because it's absolutely wonderful!

Just listen, and love.

It's just so bright and adorable!

Also, watching Voldemort fall in love is pretty entertaining. Especially when he has a nose as he's doing it.

"Today was a good day, she thought, watching the stars turn slowly in the sky. Just another reminder that we make our days. We make them good or bad, or just plain boring. She turned her eyes to the future and gave it a small satisfied smile. I know you're not always gonna' be full of good days, she thought, but at least I know the good will outweigh the bad. Then she knocked on wood so as not to jinx it."

I think this is pretty great...

Okay, have a good one!

With utmost sincerity,

Kaitlin R.

She sat there...

"She sat there, trying her best not to let the tears slip down here face.

Why are you crying? She thought angrily. Nothing's wrong. 

But there were people to be missed, things to fail at,  hurts that went deep, hearts that broke.

Ah, well, she said to herself, at least there's always tomorrow."

Indeed.

nujm o,vrfdeujm j

That's what happens when I smash my face into the keyboard.

This font reminds me of a typewriter. I really want a good, old fashioned type writer.


Look up hymn 72. I love it.


Sing like someone's listening, but you don't care what they think. Dance like everyone's watching, but you don't care what they think. Love like you been hurt before, but you're not going to let those hurts stop you.

With utmost sincerity,

Kaitlin R.

Also, if you would like to share this blog with friends, please feel free to do so. 

Also, if you would like to follow this blog, there is a button to your right that will allow you to do that.

Also, you're great. Just, you know, in case you were wondering.

The other half...

There is another quote from Peter Pan that that is very much like the one that is the title of this blog.

It is one of my favorites.

"To die will be an awfully big adventure..."

I am watching "The Blind Side." It is an absolutely wonderful movie. If you have not seen it. Do. 

Also, all that glitters is not gold...but it could be Edward Cullen.

With utmost sincerity, 

Kaitlin R.

It's nice...

It's nice to know you exist.

To feel the breath going in and out of you.

To feel your heart beating.

Existence is excellent.

Like a cold breath of fresh clear air.

Existence is, of course, infinite.

We existed before, we will exist after, and we will exist always.

Read Gilead, a book by Marilynn Robinson. It's such a wonderful book. It talks about existence. It talks about life, and pain, and I guess in some ways they're the same thing. 

As The Man In Black said, "Life is pain, Highness! Anyone who says differently is selling something."

And while I find that quote incredibly hilarious, I do not wholly  agree.

I mean, I agree that in life there is pain...lots of it...but that not the only reason why we're here. Yes, we have to know pain, but we have to know pain so we can know relief.

"She sat there then, looking out the window. Wondering why the world looked so gray. Life is more than just gray though. And in reality, there is no gray, there is only black and white...nevertheless, gray is such a lovely color." 

There is only black and white. Black and white in regards to the commandments of the Lord. There is no fence sitting. You are with Him or against Him. Living though, is meant to be so colorful. Why else would the Lord make so many colors. One of them gray, which happens to be one of my favorites.

Green and Gray...

One day I may write the rest of that sentence for you all to see.

But for now it is locked in my head and heart. And written many times in my journal.

I repeat it to myself every time there is a storm, and some days when there isn't one.

With utmost sincerity,

Kaitlin R.

 

Just so we're clear...

Google Blogger has decided that my blog is a spam blog.

Well, rather their robots have decided that.

Just so we're clear though, it is not.

I mean, does my writing seem like spam?

If it does, I am sorry.

So worry not, I don't have any links to certain pages, nor am I trying to waste your time.

But if I don't get cleared by their spam police in two days, my blog will be deleted in twenty.

If that happens that will be the second time Google Blogger has deleted my blog contrary to my wishes and/or will.

The first time was without any explanation. They just said "this blog has been deleted..."

I was pretty upset.

Anyways, I'm sure they won't. (Knock on wood.)

I am not a robot.

With utmost sincerity, 

Kaitlin R.

 

I adore it...

I am drowning myself in Harry Potter. 

And it is beyond lovely. 

I finally got myself sorted on Pottermore.

 I'm a Hufflepuff. I wanted to be a Slytherin, mostly because I love Snape and I feel they're misunderstood. 

But now that I've become a badger, I realize that there is no way I could be anything but a Hufflepuff.

I'm not ambitious or cunning, I'm not brave, and I'm not witty and clever. 

Not as much as I am loyal anyways.

The thing about Hufflepuffs is that, while they may be seen as quiet and/or dorky, they're actually quite strong. They don't go boasting about it.

They really are like badgers. They seem quiet and go around doing their own thing, but if you mess with them, they will mess back!

So, I like to think I'm kinda ferocious like a badger sometimes.

Even so, I wouldn't mind being a Slytherin, just saying. 

Regardless, yeah, so Harry Potter. I was reading the end of the fourth book today and started balling my eyes out when Voldemort and Harry are dueling in the graveyard. When the shadows of the people killed started coming out of Voldy's wand. 

What's especially amazing to me is that the feeling I feel toward all the characters, whether it's anger or disgust or love or sorrow or happiness or hilarity...the feelings are all so real.

So, it gets me to thinking that, it doesn't matter if they're "real" or not. I grew up with them. I learned with them, I laughed with them, I lost with them.

And every ounce of magic those books contain are still in my fingertips as I turn the pages. 

That's why I absolutely adore the line Albus Dumbledore says in the seventh book to Harry.

"Of course it is happening inside your head, Harry, but why on earth should that mean that it is not real?"

To me, it was J.K. Rowling speaking to every single one of her readers, who'd followed this adventure through to the end. 

"Of course it is happening inside your head, Reader, but why on earth should that mean that it is not real?" 

 Why indeed?

Perhaps I'm too overly sentimental, but I'm not going to apologize for it. 

I love to love.

Hahaha, okay, I think my Harry Potter rant time is over, for now anyway.

So, go on my lovelies! Love life, love love, love God, and serve Him.

There's a Hogwarts of our own waiting for us!

With utmost sincerity, 

Kaitlin R.

 

Moments like this...

It's moments like these when I'm awake at almost 1 o'clock in the morning, and my brain is alive, though my body has this little bit of drag to it, that I find myself in the most creative mood. 

There's a mold that I fit into, but it's just a little too small...or perhaps it's too big. Either way, I fit into it, but it's a little uncomfortable...so that makes my head hurt sometimes, and gives me little apple bruises on the heart.

I'm really not sure what any of this means. I guess, while being in my most creative mood in the wee early morning hours, I'm also at my most confusing and ramble-like too.

Maybe I'm more tired than I thought.

(Also, it says I published this at 11:54, but I assure you that it is actually 12:54. Just to clarify.)

With utmost sincerity, 

Kaitlin R. 

Days uno and two...

The first two days of being 19 have been...interesting.

On Saturday I worked a booth at the "Utah Valley Women's Expo."

After two or three women getting annoyed and upset that we didn't have anything free to give out. I decided I didn't want to be there anymore. 

This morning I woke up with a stomach ache that I promptly tried to ignore, but was forced to acknowledge half way through Sacrament Meeting when it decided to be nauseous as well as incredibly painful. I stayed long enough to sing the choir song, then booked it home.

I am feeling quite better now after spending a good deal of time with a towel on my pillow, and at the bathroom across the hall.

The only thing I really hope is that these first two days aren't a precursor to the rest of my 19th year.

I was very blessed this week though. Blessed to have friends who care about me from miles and miles away. 

Blessed to get through pain and suffering.

Blessed to know my Savior.

Have a good Sabbath.

And please enjoy this picture.

With utmost sincerity, 

Kaitlin R. 

I awoke this morning at like, 5:00 because I heard my dad's alarm clock from across the hall, even though my door was closed. 

Anyways, as I was recovering from this rude awakening, a most peculiar sentence was running though my head.

In my half awake delirium I hastily scribbled it upon a piece of paper next to my bed...I have even more awful penmanship when I'm tired...anyways, the sentence I scribbled was this:

"I'm here wondering why you called him a short yellow man."

So, there you have it...tada...

With utmost sincerity, 

Kaitlin R.